To celebrate 25 years of delicious energizing BAWLS Guarana, the company has announced it will launch a campaign to literally “inject dem schweet BAWLS into your veins.” A BAWLS spokesman said, “for 25 years our fans have asked. Now they shall receive.”
Posts by Brandon Ragsdale:
After a duck fanatic traveled 10 hours to what he believed was QuackCon, he soon realized his blunder upon entering the Gaylord Texan. “I walked into the building, duck costume on and everything, and yet not another duck in sight. Then I get told that I’m at some kind of gamer event or something. I must be going QUACKERS!”
Local man asking for next year’s QuakeCon registration details just one hour after end of prior QuakeCon
After another successful QuakeCon, local man was witnessed asking for registration details for next year’s event just one hour after the conclusion of the prior event. In unrelated news, QuakeCon staff break world record for longest sigh and loudest facepalm.
Parched gamers thrilled to discover that water fountains across the world have been replaced to dispense BAWLS Guarana instead of water. Is this the key to finally achieving world peace? Is the world healing? Steven from Texas believes so.
“Life was hard. I found myself struggling to stay awake day to day. I was struggling with depression. I didn’t see an end to my misery. Then I used the water fountain at my local movie theater and immediately knew every little thing was gonna be alright. The fuel of BAWLS flows through me every day now!”
Now everyone can feel the power of BAWLS inside them.